Pratik comes running to his dad when he returns from the office. He sits on his dad’s lap and asks him,’ how much he earns per hour’. His dad says that ‘he earns about 100/-. Pratik acknowledges that and returns back to his room. After some time Pratik comes to his dad asking for 50/-. His dad, thinking why a 5 years old needs 50/-. He scolds him a lot and demands to explain as to why he needed so much of money, at evening no answer from Pratik, he sends him back to his room to complete with his studies. Later, thinking of it as a very harsh reaction he asks Pratik, why he needed the money, to which he replies that “ I already had 50/-, so that I could have 1 hour of your time’.

Pratik’s dad realizes how ignorant he had been towards his child in order to work late hours and earn the extra credit.

In today’s era we see the change in the scenario of parenting or today, the parents have become more ignorant and impulsive in thoughts and behavior and react to the situations without the knowledge of the reality. They feel scolding, thrashing, threatening and creating FEAR in them is discipline. Teaching the ONLY thing they have to is Earn lots of money etc.

Do you really know the reason why you wanted a child? Was it because of pressure from family/relatives, or was it a mistake out of ignorance or was it simply just because you wanted a child? We aim at framing a bright future for our children when we don’t even know the real reason behind his/her birth. Do you want your child to ‘live’ his/her childhood or time to fulfill your expectations/desires?

When you look down at your childhood memories, you remember the scolding you got for not completing your homework, misbehavior and punishments we earned for scoring less in the tests. Of course, we don’t want our kids to relate their childhood memories pessimistically but we want them to live their childhood with freedom, innocence and without any restrictions just like a free bird.

A child is just like clay; they get molded in any shape we give them. Childs behavior and attitude gets affected by the behavior by his/her parents. So the parenting styles affect the core attitude of the child, which therein determines the future of the child.

Basically there are 4 types of parenting patterns. Firstly, Authoritarian in which parenting is done in aggressive manner for which discipline and rules are of high order.

This type of parenting hinders natural growth of the child. Children tend to become shy, submissive, oversensitive, skeptical about their own decisions and anxious.

Secondly, Permissive parenting includes necessary freedom, overprotective at times and submissive in nature.

In this type parenting children tend to become dominating, insensitive, stubborn, aggressive, irresponsible and selfish.

Thirdly, Uninvolved parenting child may become aggressive, hostile, arrogant or shy, introvert, depressed,

And one is, Authoritative parents who take deep interest in the upbringing of the child but do not over pamper them. These children experience emotional security and sense of responsibility. Authoritative parents are aware of their child’s mistake and limitations so they never impose their opinion and consider the child’s best interests. The child becomes co-operative, emotionally stable, confident socially well adjusted, sincere and caring. The parenting style has a deep impact on the psyche of the child. The reaction to any stimulus is conditional in the initial stages of life by observation and interpretations. Accordingly, it results in three types of responses Fright, Flight and Freeze.

The other factors which affects the parenting of the child includes nuclear families, which have double income parents who are more focused in their careers rather then appropriate rearing of their child. A new form of family structure has arisen today which is known as single parents. In this the single parent has the whole responsibility of the child and his responsibility comes with its pros and cons which further affects the personality of the child.

As adults we can express our emotions without any constraints but children don’t have the capacity to express their feelings and emotions by speaking out. They express their emotions through their behaviors we as parents need to appropriately observe and interpret what the child mean to say.

Every child has its own uniqueness we as parents should be able recognize where our Childs strengths and limitations lie and should encourage them accordingly to their capacity. We should encourage their thinking and creativity.

So it is in our hands whether “NUTURE or TORTURE’ our child …